trusting the universe

by kat

whatever the glue that holds the universe, universes, or all that IS together, be it god, goddess, spirit, great spirit, or simply nature, i believe that we can put our trust in it.

in the last twelve years, my life has taken some extremely difficult turns. i have been diagnosed with several disabilities which cause a myriad of unpleasant symptoms; nearly lost everything while unable to work and applying for disability; been terrorized and raped; had to pack up and move from my home; was injured in a serious accident; endured surgeries to correct injuries still being found.

through all of this, there have been times during which i nearly despaired, wondering especially, why i was still alive; what i would do without family here to help me. through all of this i fought to maintain trust that all would be as it should be and that i would somehow get through it.

there are many people and two cats for whom i am eternally grateful. i trusted that somehow help would be there. and it was, from the friend who lent money to get me through the year of applying, being rejected, and finally being approved for disability, to the doctors and nurses who saved me, the volunteers who drive me to appointments and the grocery store, to the neighbors who pick up my mail and my spirits.

i was wondering recently about how i will manage without family as i get older. that is when i began to realize how truly fortunate i have been. i began to mentally list the people in my life who have contributed to my well-being, in one way or another. the list is long.

i trusted and was given even more reason to trust. i am working to stop focusing on the difficulties i have faced, and, instead to see the many faces of those who appear in my life when i am most in need. you are too many to list and i thank each and every one of you for your love and your help. i love you all.

October 2015