Questions and Quotes

by Jim

  1. Did the Pony Express have ponies?
  2. Is rice paper made out of rice?
  3. If a turtle loses his shell is he homeless?
  4. Why do they lock gas station bathrooms?
  5. Why do banks leave the doors open and chain the pens to the counter?
  6. If Wal-Mart is lowering prices every day, why isn’t anything in the store free yet?
  7. Does this rag smell like chloroform?
  8. Everyone talks about the weather but nobody does anything about it.
  9. Why didn’t Noah swat those two mosquitoes?
  10. The shinbone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room.
  11. The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
  12. Casey Stengel said, “Who woulda thunk it?”
  13. Referring to a Steve McQueen movie, Yogi Berra said, “He must have made that before he died.”
  14. I heard a tenant telling the landlord, “My dog doesn’t bark when I’m not here.”

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